What to Do When Your New Year’s Resolution is Divorce

It’s a new year. If you are like many people, you have sworn to realize a new you. But what if that resolve is to file for divorce? It’s more common than you think. Family law attorneys in Orange County see a higher influx of divorce filings in January than in any other month.

Simply put, you are not alone. You are also likely planning your approach. The 2 most common questions people have prior to forging ahead are:

1. How Do I Create the Best Environment for Divorce? –and—
2. Should I Get a California Divorce Attorney?

In this article, I will address these questions at a high level while assuming you are no longer trying to save your marriage. My goal is to provide information that could help you make initial decisions. Since the details of every case are unique, speaking with a licensed attorney in California can apply legal advice to your specific situation.

How Do I Create the Best Environment for Divorce?

This is the most difficult question to answer. Marriages end in various extremes. Sometimes, the other spouse has been expecting to be served with divorce papers for years while others feel blind-sided. While it’s normal to expect emotions to run high, it can be difficult to move forward in a cordial manner when your soon-to-be ex has determined that you are the Devil’s reincarnate.

Stop. Relax. Breathe.

You can’t control what your spouse does, but you can keep yourself in check. Here are a few tips to facilitate a smoother transition:

1. Avoid posting the details of your divorce to social media in any form. It could be used against you in unexpected ways.
2. Do not escalate arguments. You can choose to responsibly leave the environment before harmful words or actions can’t be retracted.
3. Authentically express your need to your spouse for the best outcome possible that involves everyone. Sometimes, saying that you are a coming from a good place can make all the difference in honest, open communication.

Should I Get a California Divorce Attorney?

Hiring a lawyer may seem counterintuitive to the previous section but filing for divorce can become contentious quickly. Plus, the California family court system can become more complex as you involve assets, debts, prenuptial agreements, and children. When both parties have separate counsel, better decisions are given room to be made by you, your family, and judges.

Ultimately, the decision and approach is yours to make. And no, it’s not one to take lightly. If you have resolved to file for divorce in Orange County, CA or surrounding areas, hire a family law attorney that has the experience and reputation for executing strategies that are aligned with your wishes. Consider contacting me, Jeffrey D. Stearman, Attorney at Law, to help you move into the next phase of life. My Huntington Beach office can be contacted for a free initial phone consultation by calling (714) 871-7778 or by completing this form on my firm’s website.